| Nickname | Stu, Zola, Juninho ('Any wee footballer who I like 
              to think is half decent ... '), The Wee Ninja | 
           
            | Date Of Birth | 1983 (architects obviously only deal in years, none 
              of that days and months nonsense) | 
           
            | Place Of Birth | Glasgow | 
           
            | Big Team | Rangers | 
           
            | Wee Team | Partick Thistle | 
           
            | Favourite Player Ever | Brian Laudrup | 
           
            | Position | His blistering pace, fitness and tackling ability 
              mean that he could probably play anywhere on the pitch that didn't 
              involve height - striker or midfielder, then! | 
           
            | Distinguishing Features | The aforementioned pace, plus his diminutive stature | 
           
            | Lookalike | Let's start the bidding with Martin Compston out 
                of 'Sweet Sixteen' and 'Monarch Of The Glen' | 
           
            | Battlecry | Nothing so far | 
           
            | Claim To Fame | Scored on his 11s debut for the Real. Possibly the fastest player ever to grace the Stadium Of Dark. | 
           
            | 8s Appearances in 2012 | 5 out of 49 (10%) | 
           
            | 8s Appearances in 2013 | 23 out of 48 (48%) | 
           
            | 8s Appearances in 2014 | 7 out of 50 (14%) | 
          
            | 8s Appearances in 2015 | 3 out of 51 (6%) |